Couple Counselling
The starting point for couple counselling is that both parties want to attend the counselling together and both want to work on the issues to be explored.
Rather than getting caught in a power struggle, each blaming the other or trying to prove self rightness, couple counselling is about each assuming individual responsibility for what is brought to the relationship.
At the beginning of a relationship, there is often a search for the perfect other, the person that is going to make our life OK, somebody that will heal the wounds from the past, will make up for unmet needs in childhood, whether it be love, security, sense of identity or confidence. These motivations are not always conscious but can operate at subconscious levels. These can spare us from the need to start to grow up and meet our own needs.
Happy relationships can be about the creation of a happy relationship within yourself.
The more we want our partner to repair our wounds and meet our needs the more dissatisfying and potentially destructive it can become. All this does not mean that you stop showing care or support in a relationship, it is when roles become rigid that relationships can become unhealthy
Over time, there can be a widening gap between our expectations of our partner and the reality of how our partner is. This can lead to power struggles (I will control and manipulate you until you become what I want). This is often the starting point of therapy.
To discuss how counselling may benefit you and your relationship please contact Jackie Parkes on tel: 0121 454 2209 or mob: 07796 836739 or email: